Review: Transformers: Age of Extinction (2014) — Mind-Numbing Autobot Boom-Boom, Another Bay at the Office

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Michael Bay returns to the bombastic robot-fisticuff franchise in Transformers: Age of Extinction; the fourth film in the series, and despite reports to the contrary, not a reboot. This Transformers film deals with the effects of that gigantic battle in Chicago, and it’s not good for our Autobot pals:  CIA operatives are out to capture and destroy all Transformers, Decepticons and Autobots alike. Fugitive Transformers have scattered all across the USA, and it’s in a small town in Texas where failed inventor Cade Yeager (Mark Wahlberg) finds a dilapidated truck that winds up being the wheeled form of Autobot leader and franchise stalwart Optimus Prime.Yeager and his family must join the Autobots in evading the US government, led by Harold Attinger (Kelsey Grammer), and their associate, a mysterious bounty hunter known as Lockdown.

Twin guns? Check. Explosions? Check. City-wide destruction? Check.

Twin guns? Check. Explosions? Check. City-wide destruction? Check.

These Transformers movies need to be taken with a grain of salt; you know exactly what you’re getting when you purchase your ticket. It was to my surprise that the first act of this film was actually quite enjoyable: the character interactions were reasonable (despite clunky, cliché dialogue), and Bay’s directing was surprisingly restrained (for his standards). But after a major car-chase action sequence at the end of the first act the film becomes a mind-numbing bore. Meaningless action scenes with no plot development, wretched and laughable dialogue, and awful pacing and editing: the exact stuff I was initially dreading. This is a film that goes well over two and a half hours, but could easily have been edited down to one and a half. Classic Michael Bay over-indulgence

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Review: How To Train Your Dragon 2 (2014) — Animated Perfection Breathes Hot Fire into Cinemas

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Animated movies these days are a dime a dozen, with studios such as Pixar, DreamWorks, Blue Sky Studios (Ice Age), Disney, and newcomers such as Illumination Entertainment (Despicable Me) all dominating the 3D computer-animated landscape. This lucrative market is big-business and big bucks, and many of the top grossing films each year are from 3D animated films. But as the quantity rises, the overall quality of the output seems to be taking a dip. Even the once infallible Pixar are no longer a sure thing; increasing the numbers of sequels produced to diminishing critical response.

But every now and then an animated film comes along that reminds us how magical the medium can be with the right execution. Enter How To Train Your Dragon 2.

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Review: Edge of Tomorrow (2014) — Cruise Keeps Dying, Doesn’t Stop Running, in Smart and Gripping Sci-Fi Spectacle

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In the near future, alien creatures — known as Mimics — have conquered most of mainland Europe, with global domination in mind. A last-ditch assault is planned by the military: a surprise attack on France, fueled by the addition of weaponised ‘Jackets’ worn by human soldiers. After attempting to weasel out of front-line deployment, Major William Cage (Tom Cruise) is apprehended and knocked out by military general Brigham (Brendan Gleeson), who dumps him with the infantry unit J-Squad en-route to the invasion. The cowardly Cage winds up in an explosion with an advanced Mimic known as an Alpha, and the Alpha’s caustic blood spills over Cage as he dies. Cage wakes aboard the same vessel on the day before the battle. Confusion sets in as he repeatedly dies on the battlefield and awakes the day before, stuck in an infinite loop. With the assistance of war hero Rita Vrataski, the “Full Metal Bitch” (Emily Blunt), Cage realises his curse may be the key to victory over the Mimics.

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Review: Godzilla (2014) — The Big Guy Plays Hide and Seek in Epic Monster Smackdown

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The 30th Godzilla film opens in 1999, with an apparent earthquake triggering a meltdown at a nuclear plant near Tokyo, Japan, killing the wife of technician Joe Brody (Bryan Cranston). Flash to present day, where Brody and his estranged son Ford (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) reunite after many years. During that time, the elder Brody has become an obsessed conspiracy theorist as a result of the tragedy which took his wife, and what he uncovers sets in motion the events which lead to the return of Godzilla, as well as a couple of other nasty kaiju known as MUTO (Massive Unidentified Terrestrial Organism). Godzilla is turned loose to hunt the MUTO, but can he take them out before they reproduce?

The King of Monsters is back after a ten year absence, but instead of beginning a new era under the careful eye of long-term Japanese production company Toho, the keys to the franchise have been passed on to Hollywood. 1998 was the first and last time that a Godzilla film was produced outside Japan, and I think we can all remember how that turned out:

The horror...

The horror…

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Review: Bad Neighbours, aka Neighbors (2014) — Rogen/Byrne vs. Efron Pledge Their Comedy Chops

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From director Nicholas Stoller (Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Get Him to the Greek), Bad Neighbours features Seth Rogen (Knocked Up) and Rose Byrne (Insidious) as new parents Mac and Kelly Radner; a couple teetering on the brink of full-fledged adulthood, but having a hard time letting go of their youth. Enter a fraternity led by Zac Efron (17 Again) and Dave Franco (21 Jump Street), who move into the house next door. When attempts to initially bond with the frat fail and the inevitable late-night partying commences, Mac and Kelly find themselves in a desperate turf war where they fight for their right to not party.

As we know by now, Rogen is an actor that finds it hard to stretch from his normal shtick of lazy, stoner, slob-guy. The good news is that — at this stage, at least — Rogen has yet to wear out his welcome as he continues to place his characters in interesting situations surrounded by talented, funny co-stars. The premise of Bad Neighbours is a simple Hatfield/McCoy-like premise of two warring parties, which is broad enough to simply place hilarious people into the situation and let funny things happen.

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May the 4th: Star Wars Episode VII Casting Thoughts

Luke Miksa's: The Negative Space Bar

Last week saw the long-awaited — and much delayed — first casting announcement for the next generation in the Star Wars saga. It is the as-yet untitled Star Wars Episode VII, to be directed by JJ Abrams and released December 2015. Here are some key omissions and additions:

Missing Names

A large portion of returning names have been announced: Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Harrison Ford, Anthony Daniels, Kenny Baker, and Peter Mayhew; but there are some overlooked names that I would still like to see. The following may be announced later on, or they may appear in surprise cameos, but any continuation of Return of the Jedi would not be complete without…

Billy Dee Williams

Lando Calrissian

This is a major name to not have in the first official announcement. By the conclusion of the original saga, Lando Calrissian became one of the major protagonists: he helped orchestrate the rescue of Han Solo from Jabba’s palace, and he led the Rebellion in its attack against the second Death Star. He was actually the man to destroy the second Death Star, piloting the Millennium Falcon (which is sure to make an appearance). Lando Calrissian not being a part of this new incarnation is a terrible miss.

Bring back his co-pilot Nien Nunb while you’re at it. And Lobot. Bring back Lobot.

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